"We've got that whole organizing-the-world's-information thing more or less under control," said Google Co-founder and President Larry Page, a longtime supporter of so-called "dark porcelain" research and development. "What's interesting, though, is how many different modalities there are for actually getting that information to you - not to mention from you."

"I couldn't be more excited about, and am only slightly grossed out by, this remarkable new product," said Marissa Mayer, Google's Vice President of Search Products and User Experience. "I firmly believe TiSP will be a breakthrough product, particularly for those users who, like Larry himself, do much of their best thinking in the bathroom."

As you figured it out, unfortunately it's only an April Fool's joke from Google. However, we can't help but fantasize about this great service:

Google has successfully devised a "last hundred smelly yards" solution that takes advantage of preexisting plumbing and sewage systems and their related hydraulic data-transmission capabilities. "There's actually a thriving little underground community that's been studying this exact solution for a long time," says Page. "And today our Toilet ISP team is pleased to be leading the way through the sewers, up out of your toilet and - splat - right onto your PC."

They also have posted do-it-yourself instructions on how to get it started right now:

http://www.google.com/tisp/install.html

It only takes 8 easy steps to get online at full speed, using the do-it-yourself package, or you can have a professional come in and hook up your toilet to the network. For your own physical safety and emotional well-being and in consideration of the nanobots' working conditions, please make absolutely certain that your toilet is unoccupied at the scheduled appointment time, Google warns.

Google has also announced it is actively developing a higher-performance version of TiSP specifically tailored to small and medium-sized businesses, including 24-hour, on-site technical support in the event of backup problems, brownouts and data wipes.

The Toilet Internet Service Provider (TiSP) project is a self-installed, ad-supported online service that will be offered entirely free to any consumer with a WiFi-capable PC and a toilet connected to a local municipal sewage system. TiSP is available today only in the U.S. and Canada. Google announced it has formed an international consortium of utility companies, sewage system experts, toilet manufacturers, and plumbers to develop solutions to the many problems facing all "dark porcelain"-based data-delivery innovators.

Why still in BETA phase? "When things go wrong with TiSP, they go very, very wrong. Let's leave it at that," Google answers.

So, rush out and order this April Fool's Day special from Google. It's such a great offer, it might not be available until the next Fool's Day.

Israeli Attorney General Meni Mazuz notified lawyers for Israeli President Moshe Katsav that a second rape charge may be added to Katsav's indictment for alleged sex crimes. The additional charges were made by the same woman who originally accused Katsav of sexual assault, fraud, and rape but it has not been made clear why these allegations have only recently emerged. Katsav, who has been on a leave of absence from his largely ceremonial post since January, was interrogated by police for more than two hours last week about the most recent charges.

Despite pleas for resignationfrom legal commentators and Prime Minister Ehud Olmert, Katsav has refused to considering resignation. All Israeli senior state officials have the right to a hearing before the attorney general before an indictment is formally filed. Katsav's hearing is tentatively scheduled for May 2. Katsav currently has immunity, but can be impeached or prosecuted after he leaves office at the end of this term this year.

"The military commission system is transparent all right – transparently corrupt," Terry Hicks said, exuberant about the leniency of his son's sentence but still furious about the treatment the 31-year-old Muslim convert has endured for five years.

David Hicks will serve a nine-month sentence in a prison in his hometown of Adelaide after admitting last week that he aided al-Qaida in a plea deal at the US naval base at Guantanamo Bay.

The deal prevents him from talking to the media for 12 months or pursuing his allegations of abuse while in US custody.

Legal observers and opposition lawmakers have joined Terry Hicks in saying the deal is tailored to remove potential political embarrassment for Australian Prime Minister John Howard, who will seek his fifth three-year term as national leader at elections due later this year.

The agency was required to undertake some type of consultation, informal or otherwise, prior to making a conclusive determination that there would be no effect. Given the 2005 Rule's potential indirect effects on listed species, combined with the USDA's lack of documentation in support of their "no effect" determination, the failure to consult and/or prepare any type of biological analysis in conjunction with the 2005 Rule was arbitrary and capricious.

At the same time, Hamilton declined to reinstate a 1982 regulation, as the environmental groups had sought.

Rodger Schlickeisen, president of Defenders of Wildlife, one of the plaintiff groups, praised Hamilton's ruling, saying:

The Bush administration reversed decades of progress in managing national forests, without considering the impacts on wildlife and the environment. The administration also cut the public out of the loop when considering these large-scale changes to how our nation's forests are managed.

US Justice Department officials are considering an appeal.

Dubbed the Xbox 360 Elite, the third version of the game console will be jet black in colour, boast a 120 GB hard drive (versus the standard Xbox 360's 20 GB drive) and have an HDMI output jack and cable, allowing it to take advantage of the highest resolution available on current high-definition TVs.

But the impending arrival of the Xbox 360 Elite hasn't been met with universal praise, even from among some of the Xbox faithful on Internet forums. Some fans are pointing out that the Elite is the same price as the entry level PlayStation 3 model, but lacks the PS3's built-in high-definition, high-capacity Blu-ray disc drive.

Others are bitter that they recently bought an Xbox 360 without having any inkling that a better model of the game console was on the way for just $50 more.

The Xbox 360 Elite's controller and headset will also be black in color, and black versions of most Xbox 360 accessories will be available in stores when the new console goes on sale.

For those who want to upgrade their current Xbox 360, the 120 GB hard drive will be sold separately for $209, but existing Xbox 360s will not have an option of being upgraded to support HDMI output.

Al-Nashiri has already been convicted and sentenced to death after a trial in absentia in Yemen, the site of the USS Cole attack. He is one of the 14 "high value" detainees moved from secret overseas CIA prisons.

Predominantly-Islamic Somalia has endured a lengthy civil war and several rounds of failed peace talks since the collapse of its last civil government in 1991.